Jeggings: Charlotte Russe, Blazer: Thrifted, Flannel: Target, Necklace: F21, Boots: Thrifted
I’ve never seen a ransom note before but I’ve always supposed it would go something like this.
“This is a very scary man, meet me with 7 million dollars on Fresco Bridge on Friday and you’ll get your treasured monkey back”
The word monkey of course being used literally because in all of my day dreams I have a monkey named Dilbert, he’s remarkably courteous unlike all of those other barbarian poop throwing monkeys. Anyways, it finally happened. I received a ransom note...or at least the closest thing to it! Except for to my dismay it was nothing like my fantasies. It read,
I find it very necessary to express how I feel to angry biker man in my own little ransom note.“Just wanted to let you know you locked my bike into the bike rack today… luckily your lock was almost undone. Try not to crowd the bars so much next time"
"Dear angry biker, due to your unibomber handwriting I was sure that my cat would be dead when I got home, or my car would have slits in all of its tires, however this is just not so. Perhaps you are kind, strange mean biker man. I sure will try to not lock my bike to yours...but just in case of a reoccuring event please try not to use "biker" terms next time because I have absolutely no clue what "crowding the handle bars" means according to bike locking and placing etiquette. Thank you, and meet me on Fresco bridge in an hour with 7 million dollars and you indeed will get your monkey back."